Random Thoughts

I just thought about Peter, the Apostle Peter.

How did he feel when his best friend was given a humiliating death; beaten in public, made a laughing stock as he was taken round the city, killed outside the city gates signifying that he was unworthy of the city, not just an ordinary death but a grueling criminal kind of torture and subsequently, death- on a cross, hung between two thieves.

How did Peter feel? Known in town as the friend of a criminal; worse still,  to the religious ones, Peter was seen as the friend of a false prophet,  a blasphemer who claimed to be the Son of God.

After all those healings and miracles, his friend could not save himself. He must have looked and hoped and watched and waited, but his friend still hung helplessly on the cross.

Yes, this friend had told him something of this sort will happen. He had also told him that he (Peter) would deny him. And true to those words, he had denied his friend in the heat of the moment. He didn't know it was going to turn out badly. He couldn't bear it as at then.

Around him, many others must have been wailing and mourning, men and women, children and babies. He was the supposed leader of the gang, but he was then as helpless as they were. His confidence had been dashed, all seemed bleak.

Notwithstanding, no literary efficiency is enough to convey his sense of guilt, loss, pain and sorrow. 

Days later, could life have become worse? Another friend committed suicide. Peter was yet to recover from the shocking reality that this trusted friend of his was the same person that betrayed his beloved friend and Master. He must have been brewing from unbelief, confusion and instability on how to manage his anger towards the betrayer... And then, the betrayer committed suicide. A wave of disgust must have come over Peter-to rejoice or to mourn.

Well, I also believe that Peter was a man of like passion as we are. I was just thinking of him and how he must have felt back then.

Have you had such thoughts too?